A Silver Wedding: Matt and Lilly: The Macconwood Pack Tales 7 Page 4

  “Mine,” he seemed to breathe that word. Again and again he’d said it. Staking his claim with his language and his body at the same time. But he didn’t bite her.

  Years ago, he’d wanted to. And she’d wanted it too. Wanted him to remove the biting mark Zev had left on the back of her neck. Wanted to erase all of the evidence he’d left of rutting her like a damn animal.

  Zev had been violent and coarse by nature. That very first time he’d had sex with her, after their vows were said, it had been difficult and rough. Not at all like Matt. The entire relationship was a horror story.

  Oh Matt. How can we do this again? Are we destined to constantly want each other without reprieve?

  Matt had always been different. Sweet and caring, sexy as hell. Her first love. Her only love. She sighed and inhaled the fresh scent of new grass and evening dew on the leaves that hung overhead. Their reunion could only take place here, in the woods. It was perfect. Home.

  “What are you thinking about?” He smoothed her back and tilted her face up to his.

  He was so handsome. A silly grin touched his straight, hard-looking lips. She knew the truth though. Those lips were magic. They’d touched and caressed every inch of her body. As if they were made to do just that.

  Lilly couldn’t help but smile back at him. He looked like a boy who’d gotten caught with his hand in the cookie jar. A fetching blush of pink stained his cheeks as her eyes raked his body.

  Werewolves weren’t shy by nature, but this was Matt. He’d always been a tad old fashioned and she’d always liked it. Lilly simply couldn’t help but stare. He was here. Real and in person. Matt.

  “I’m thinking, this was nice,” she said carefully.

  Lilly wanted this, wanted him more than anything, but she’d allowed her passions to override her common sense once before. And look what happened. She sat up. Hating the distance, it put between them.

  “Nice? I’d say earth shattering, but maybe I need to try again?” He nudged her playfully in her side with his nose, teeth nipping her tender flesh and she smiled through her watery eyes.

  “It was more than nice, Matt, but it can’t happen again-”

  “What?” He stilled and her heart thundered in her chest. She could hardly breathe, but she wouldn’t look away. She’d face him as she told him her decision. Lilly owed him that much.

  “I’ve just come home. After twenty years. I need to be with my children. There’s a role I have to fulfill, and I can’t let anything interfere with that again,” she gasped as he suddenly rolled to his feet.

  “That’s bullshit. This is real, Claire, you and me, are real,” he began.

  “I know that, but we aren’t kids anymore. I can’t be selfish again,” she stood too, putting more space between them.

  “No, we’re not kids. How many people do you think get a second chance like this?”

  “I’m sorry,” she said, but he was too angry to listen.

  He turned from her and roared his pain. Falling to his knees he grunted and groaned, the force of his Change coming on too strong, too fast.

  Lilly sunk to the floor next to him. She howled a low, soft hum of a song that helped soothe the other Wolf. He finished his transformation without pain. His Wolf a thing of beauty. Wild and yet controlled, his massive size was impressive. Matt turned to her his silver eyes the color of steel as he stared her down.

  She recognized his animal, knew the beast was trying to help his human half by bearing the brunt of his pain. Pain she’d caused. Lilly lifted her hand wanting to touch him. She longed to feel his fur beneath her fingers one last time. But he bounded off into the trees, leaving her alone with her thoughts.

  “I’m sorry,” she whispered and stood up.

  She found her own fur and walked back to the Manor. The structures that graced the landscape may have changed, but the woods were the same. They remembered.

  Still shuddering from her Change, she donned one of the terrycloth robes that were fresh and folded in a cabinet in the mudroom. Apparently, her new daughter-in-law insisted the Wolf Guard dress before entering the house.

  She smiled thinking of the sassy little human that had found her son and claimed his heart. Charley was a delight. A whirlwind of energy and honesty in a curvy little package that Rafe couldn’t do without.

  Their matebond was so strong, Lilly had to shield her eyes when she’d spied it. Her own Wolf had howled with delight for her firstborn. He had a family of his own. He was a wise and strong Wolf, and he was more than likely about to be named High Alpha of the entire Western World.

  She sent a silent prayer into the universe that he always be protected by whatever spirits and deities were listening. Having been raised with Christian beliefs didn’t mean Lilly wasn’t aware that there were other forces in this world and beyond.

  She was more than aware. In fact, she sometimes communed with the dead. It was scary and unpredictable the first time it happened. She was already in her thirties and living among the Black Sea Wolves. Anri Bagrat had finally allowed her to leave her dungeon in favor of a small seaside house.

  There she grew herbs and read books. Assisted the Pack healer with making salves and remedies. One night the old she-Wolf had come to rouse Lilly from her bed, only it wasn’t her. It was her spirit. Her human shape had drifted in and out of view, but her anima magicae, the heart of her magic, Her Wolf, had remained strong, sending forth a great howl that seemed to pulse through Lilly.

  Just like that, she’d imparted her knowledge of healing and Lilly had become a kind of Shaman of the Pack. She’d embraced her role and was given the lovely Ana as apprentice the next day. She missed the girl and made a note to send her a care package as soon as she spoke with Charley.

  Matt. The knowledge of what she’d done was right there, evident on her skin and in her heart. No matter how she tried to distract herself as she hurried through the halls to her room, she couldn’t shake it off. She’d hurt him. Damn.

  So lost in her thoughts, she almost collided with a short, chubby orange cat as she rounded a corner. The beast hissed at Lilly and she laughed. A cat? In a house full of Werewolves.

  “Oh, don’t laugh at him. Buttercup is vindictive,” Conall crouched down low a bit of turkey from the sandwich he’d been carrying between his fingers.

  “Here you go, you little demon,” the cat hissed and Conall doubled his offering, “I’m just joking, Buttercup. Now, you play nice now with Mrs. Maccon,” he said.

  Conall hopped to his feet and turned to Lilly with a broad smile on his handsome face. Cocky and self-assure, those were the two words that sprang to mind as she looked at him. But there was something else there too. Something she could see in his aura. And he used it to purposefully distance himself behind his charm. Hmm. Interesting.

  “Oh,” his cheeks turned pink as he walked closer and she realized he could scent Matt on her skin.

  Lilly was too old to blush and run in a closet. She was a woman and a Wolf. And she wasn’t ashamed. Not at all.

  “Uh, so, you and Matt?” The blonde Werewolf rubbed the back of his neck with one hand, the other holding his sandwich.

  “Thanks for your help with Buttercup, Conall,” she hoped she’d interrupted his inappropriate line of questioning.

  “Yeah, no problem. So is it like a thing,” he continued, as if he was totally unaware that she was trying to avoid talking about it.

  The sound of heavy footsteps coming down the hall alerted her to more of the Wolf Guard heading their way and she started to walk, but he followed her.

  “Mrs. Maccon, he didn’t do anything to hurt you?”

  “Of course not and keep your voice down!” She groaned when she saw the other three Wolves perk up and head toward them, righteous indignation in their eyes. It was just her bad luck that Rafe was among them.

  “Who hurt you?” His barely contained growl had the other Wolves looking at the floorboards and Lilly groaning. Crap.

  The second he was within two feet of her h
is ice blue eyes went wide. He sniffed. The others coughed. No one would look at her.

  “Oh God. Okay boys, do I need to explain the birds and the bees to you all?” She used her best mom voice; one she’d practiced on the children of the Black Sea Pack often and was pleased she hadn’t lost her touch when they all had the grace to look ashamed of themselves. Not to mention embarrassed.

  “Will you please give us some space,” Rafe barked the order to his Guard and they fell in line behind him. Like way behind him. Lilly smiled.

  “Rafe, thank you for being concerned, I want you to know it was a reunion of sorts, but I explained to Matt that I have a role to fulfill here, so you don’t need to concern yourself,” she felt her voice catch and her eyes burn with unshed tears.

  “Mom?”

  “I, I need some time okay? Excuse me,” she walked away leaving a stunned Rafe and a slightly embarrassed Wolf Guard behind.

  A hot shower and some tea. Maybe a cookie or two dozen and I will be right as rain. She wiped her face and headed to her room. But would she ever feel right again without Matt at her side?

  CHAPTER 8

  Damn. Damn. DAMN. Matt had waited as long as he could to race back to the Macconwood Manor. Forty-eight hours. Two whole days away from her. Dammit. His Wolf scratched just underneath his skin. Now that he’d seen her again and formed a bond, each minute apart was a study in pure agony.

  Grrr. Mine. He paced up and down his Alpha’s office, having let himself in already. He knew he was early but fuck it. Mate. Find. Matt closed his eyes and wrestled his Wolf down. The beast wanted his mate. And he wasn’t going to be contained for long.

  Matt groaned and shook his hair out. He felt like a fucking kid. He’d gone to work but was completely useless. So, he went home, washed up and promptly returned to the Manor intent on having it out with Rafe. Alpha or not, Matt was willing to go toe to toe with the man for his mate.

  He’d been a stupid kid before the last time fate and that fucker Zev had ripped her from his fingers. Too young and too damn obedient, Matt had allowed Zev to bully and intimidate him. He’d used his Alpha powers and horrible threats against Cat to keep Matt in line. No more.

  He felt beads of sweat forming on his brow. Slumping into a chair he tried to calm himself. Is it hot in here? No. It was just nerves. Going up against one’s Alpha tended to be a little unnerving. But she is worth it. Damn straight.

  “I will not lose her again,” he growled to himself and ran a hand through his hair for the umpteenth time.

  “I am glad to hear it,” Rafe’s answering voice made the older Wolf jump to his feet.

  Matt had always been a good soldier. A good officer. He had a healthy appreciation for rank and afforded Rafe a real and honest amount of respect as his Alpha and simply as a man. He was nothing like the animal who sired him.

  Still, Matt was not about to allow one more person, man, woman, or Wolf, to come between him and Claire. She was his fated mate. He knew that now. Back then, fated mates were the stuff of legend. Exceedingly rare, if at all. But now, with all the new happenings, he knew she was his. Mine.

  “Rafe, I-”

  “Sit down, Matt.”

  “Look, I know you just got her back, but I love her-”

  “Matt. Sit down. Please.” Rafe’s blue eyes danced as he took his seat behind his enormous desk.

  Matt moved to stand once again, but his Alpha raised his hand slightly. The gentle command was present in the silence, and the older Wolf sat back down. Damn. Anxiety was making him jumpy. His Wolf was agitated as hell.

  The office door opened and in walked a vision of beauty. Matt smiled at his daughter, Cat Maccon-Nighthawk, and her ever present hubby. The man did not return the greeting. Never did.

  Matt frowned. Tate Nighthawk was one hell of a Wolf Guard, but he was a very serious Wolf. He wondered if he ever smiled. Fuck it. The man made his daughter happy and that was good enough for him.

  “Dad,” Cat kissed her father’s cheek and sat down on a chair next to her mate.

  Tate took her hand and Matt was pleased to note the Wolf looked nowhere else. His dark eyes followed Matt’s daughter wherever she moved. He better always treat her right. Matt couldn’t help the thought. He was her father after all. Something he could finally claim aloud.

  “Rafe, I wanted to speak to you about Claire alone-”

  “Dad, Rafe asked me to come. We know you and Mom have history,” she began, and he realized his daughter was nervous.

  “It’s not history,” he growled and closed his mouth. He wasn’t angry at his pup or her mate or brother. He was angry at himself.

  “Look, Claire is my fated mate.”

  “What?” Cat asked.

  “You’re certain?” Rafe seconded.

  “Of course,” Tate answered for him and Matt’s esteem for the solemn-faced Wolf went up a notch.

  “Yes. I am certain. I know you just got her back, but I can’t be without her. So, if you’ll have me, I want to stay here. Hell, I’ll sleep outside. I just need a chance to woo her-”

  “Dad calm down. Mom has been moping around here for two days without you.”

  “She has?”

  “Yes,” Rafe answered, “Look Matt, I respect you, heck, I even like you.”

  For some reason, Rafe’s confession made Matt blush. He was a good man. Not like his sire. In a lot of ways, Rafe was a goddamned miracle. The fact he turned out the way he did was a testament to that Wolf’s character, integrity, and strength.

  “Why don’t you start at the beginning of the issue between you two? Um, after whatever occurred between the two of you in the woods,” black eyebrows raised, Rafe gestured for Matt to speak.

  Shit. They know. He waited until his Alpha was completely finished before he answered. The entire room was quiet waiting for him to respond. He took a minute, but Matt had always been an honest man. He was not ashamed of his feelings for his mate. Hell, he wanted to shout them to the whole damned world. Certainly, waited long enough to do so.

  “Okay. Well, you should know that Claire-”

  “Why do you call her that?” Cat interrupted.

  “What?”

  “Claire. Everyone calls mom Lilly,” she quirked her eyebrow and Matt smiled.

  “When we were young, I wanted her to know how much she meant to me, so I told her I know everyone calls you Lilly, but you’re my Claire, and she always has been,” he looked at his hands then turned his attention back to everyone.

  “She’s my fated mate. There is no doubt. When I saw her again it was like the sun coming out for the first time in twenty years. You can’t imagine what it was like,” he sighed and raised his head, meeting both his daughter’s and her brother’s gaze as he continued, “Imagine not really knowing, but always suspecting that the other half of your soul is out there somewhere,” he ran a hand over his face, never one to unburden himself in front of others, but he needed her kids to understand where he was coming from.

  “When we were younger, we were wild for each other. Your mom was like sunshine. Well, whenever she’d managed to get away from her father and later, from Zev. I mean no disrespect Rafe, but he was a monster.”

  “No offense taken, Matt. I know what he was. And I agree with you,” Rafe replied.

  “Dad, we understand what you went through-” Cat began.

  “Oh sweetheart, you can’t possibly know. It’s like I’ve been asleep this whole time. Only half-alive without her, without knowing for sure. Now that she’s here, it’s like a neon sign is blaring in my brain and in my heart and it won’t shut off. My Wolf is about to burst out of my skin every second of the day. He wants her. I want her. I need her! I’m here to tell you both I love your mother and I intend to claim her. I won’t let anything stand in my way.”

  He stood up and met the eyes of every single Wolf in the room, dropping them slightly in deference to Rafe’ position when he reached him.

  “What happened to you both is tragic. And yet, it’s also a story ful
l of hope, Matt. But why would we take offence? Help me understand,” the Alpha said.

  “She thinks she has to be here for you, because she wasn’t before. Says she has a role to fulfill now. She never really got to be a mother to either of you,” he sighed guiltily, knowing she wasn’t wrong, but still needing her, “Then you gave her that folder with all your plans. So, she has a job now. But look, I won’t stop her from helping you with your plans. Hell, I’d offer my help too. I just need to be with her, Rafe, Cat. I need Claire with me.”

  “Oh Dad, I think that’s beautiful,” Cat leaned over and squeezed his hand.

  “Matt, look, you’ve got my vote. I think your ten times the man and Wolf Zev ever was, but again why tell us this?” Rafe shrugged.

  “So you know I’m honest. So you understand what I intend. I want Claire, I just don’t know how to approach her. She won’t come to the phone. I’ve tried,” Matt sighed, exasperated and feeling like a kid again.

  It was infuriating that he couldn’t be near the woman he loved to try and woo her without asking for permission. But that was Pack life. And he wasn’t gonna lose her again. Certainly not for something as stupid as pride.

  “I think I have an idea,” Rafe smiled.

  CHAPTER 9

  Lilly sat in one of the many little gardens that surrounded the Macconwood Manor. She was astounded by the changes since her banishment to her childhood home. Nothing short of miraculous, she sighed.

  Oh please. Lilly, you are too old for girlish sighs and daydreaming, she scolded herself and got back to weeding. Charley had established a few separate, fenced off patches of earth for veggies, fruits, berries, flowers, and herbs. Like this one. Lilly loved the fresh scent of the budding herbs and medicinal shrubs.

  Thin stalks of bright green were just beginning to push their way through the earth towards the sky. The slow progress was well worth the wait, Lilly knew from experience. The aconitum was placed at the far back of the garden. She smiled at the useful flowering herb which helped many a transitioning Werewolf to get hold of the animal within them.